SUS45 asked:
My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 3 years. He was pretty much my first love and we basically jumped into a serious relationship (as in I moved in with him). We’ve been living together for over 2 years and he’s getting worse and worse as the days go by. At first, I enjoyed catering to his every need. Cooking for him, cleaning, doing all of the laundry. It was fun at the time, it was my first taste of freedom and being an adult, and taking care of someone I love. Now, it’s almost like he doesn’t know how to pick up after himself or put the clothes in the laundry basket. He will play video games every opportunity he has (which is before work, after work, and all day on his days off). He can’t even cook for himself. If I don’t fix anything to eat, he won’t eat. It’s…beyond ridiculous. I am 21 years old and I feel like I’m 40. We have a great home, great income, I’m in college, it’s simply a great time in our lives, and he can’t get off his **** and stop playing video games, or do anything else at that. He tells me “If we aren’t out doing something, why am I not going to play video games? What am I suppose to do? Watch t.v. with you?” He just doesn’t see the point. He thinks since we live together, that’s spending time together. Besides that, he doesn’t ever want to go grocery shopping or get out and pay the bills, do things we need to do. And sure, I can do these things myself, but why wouldn’t he want to with me? I don’t know what to do. I have asked him in the past if he could devote just one day out of the week to spend time with me and NOT play his games and he said “No.” His friends come over EVERY Saturday night, for the past 9 months, and I asked him if just US could do something on a Saturday, and he says “No.” It’s ruining me. I don’t understand. He wants to be with me, I know that. I can’t get him to understand that one day I’m not going to be able to do this anymore. I want to be with him for the rest of my life. I want to get married and have kids. But not if he doesn’t grow up. What if he never does? I’ve tried everything. I’ve walked out on him, I’ve threatened to leave him for good. Everything. Is anyone going through the same thing?
My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 3 years. He was pretty much my first love and we basically jumped into a serious relationship (as in I moved in with him). We’ve been living together for over 2 years and he’s getting worse and worse as the days go by. At first, I enjoyed catering to his every need. Cooking for him, cleaning, doing all of the laundry. It was fun at the time, it was my first taste of freedom and being an adult, and taking care of someone I love. Now, it’s almost like he doesn’t know how to pick up after himself or put the clothes in the laundry basket. He will play video games every opportunity he has (which is before work, after work, and all day on his days off). He can’t even cook for himself. If I don’t fix anything to eat, he won’t eat. It’s…beyond ridiculous. I am 21 years old and I feel like I’m 40. We have a great home, great income, I’m in college, it’s simply a great time in our lives, and he can’t get off his **** and stop playing video games, or do anything else at that. He tells me “If we aren’t out doing something, why am I not going to play video games? What am I suppose to do? Watch t.v. with you?” He just doesn’t see the point. He thinks since we live together, that’s spending time together. Besides that, he doesn’t ever want to go grocery shopping or get out and pay the bills, do things we need to do. And sure, I can do these things myself, but why wouldn’t he want to with me? I don’t know what to do. I have asked him in the past if he could devote just one day out of the week to spend time with me and NOT play his games and he said “No.” His friends come over EVERY Saturday night, for the past 9 months, and I asked him if just US could do something on a Saturday, and he says “No.” It’s ruining me. I don’t understand. He wants to be with me, I know that. I can’t get him to understand that one day I’m not going to be able to do this anymore. I want to be with him for the rest of my life. I want to get married and have kids. But not if he doesn’t grow up. What if he never does? I’ve tried everything. I’ve walked out on him, I’ve threatened to leave him for good. Everything. Is anyone going through the same thing?
I’m sorry, I know this crap went on and on. Thank you for taking the time to read it 
I feel for you so much. He has got so used to you doing everything for him, doing what he wants when he wants and goes out with who he likes with out any consideration for you!.. He really doesn’t deserve someone like you, but if you was to turn around and tell him that you wasn’t happy and you was to move out, he would be so lost, he wouldn’t know where to start.
Every other weekend he should be spending it with you and have time for his mates, but you need to be his main priority, or he will lose you. he cant just push you aside and expect you to still be there for him.
You need to put your feelings first here, and he is really taking advantage of you, you need to put your foot down and tell him you want things changing, and if he is not willing to change then you need to get out of that relationship, you need someone who wants to treat you like a princess and doesn’t except you to do everything for them waiting on hand and foot.
I know you will love him but you cant feel like that, you need to be happy, and he really needs to change, maybe you could try not living together, and make the relationship less intense?..See eachother a few times a week and you will appriciate your time together so much more.
Good luck
x
Seems like your more his mom then his girlfriend, sorry to say. Yo seem to be doing EVERYTHING for him. He has moved out of his parents home where he was depending on someone to having someone moving in with him where once again he has someone to depend on for everything. You seem like you need a big break. Sometimes guys are to hard headed.. well people in general are like that at times. He needs to see that if he doesn’t start taking care of his own things that you wont be there for long. Take a break, not forever, just for a bit. So he can see an realize he really needs to get his **** together. an dont go for a week or two.. really go.. for a couple of months. That will drive him crazy. Good luck. Hope this helps.